这些书面语体怎么改成口语体

我外贸家教老师给我布置了话题讨论的作业
　　她说做生意有时候要跟客户闲聊几句,我在网上找了一些资料,自己改得口语一点
　　不过水平实在太差,有些句子怎么也不会改
　　请大家帮帮忙
　　每段中括号的内容是我改写的
TOPIC 2 EARTHQUAKE
The death toll from the earthquake rose to 41,353 as of noon on Wednesday, according to the Information Office of the State Council.
And there were still 32,666 missing in the 8.0-magnitude [ˈmægnitju:d] quake.
[More than 40,000 people have dead in the earthquake,and about 32,500 missing in the 8.0-magnitude quake.]

With the increasing number of deaths and the coming summer, the quake disaster regions are facing mounting pressure to prevent epidemics though no epidemic outbreak or serious mass health accident had been reported yet.
Medical teams with about 45,000 members were working in all quake-hit counties and townships in Sichuan as of Wednesday, according to the Ministry of Health.
[The hot summer are coming,and the number of deaths are increasing,the quake-hit areas are facing pressure to prevent epidemics though no epidemic outbreak or serious mass health accident had been reported so far.Medical teams are working in all quake-hit counties and towns.]

Students in quake hit areas have resumed classes in makeshift schools. It seems it'll take time for students and teachers alike to go back to normality.
many schools that have restarted classes in Sichuan province are conducting lessons on earthquakes and disaster prevention.
[Some schools have restarted classes in temporary schools.It seems students and teachers need time to get over it.Lessons on earthquakes and disaster prevention were taught in many schools.]

The massive earthquake in Sichuan Province has left many kids orphaned.
Now, thousands of people in China's big cities like Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou have registered to adopt these orphans.
Many people are sharing the government's responsibility to look after these children.
The Guangzhou Daily carries a commentary saying such deep feelings and sense of responsibility are worth cherishing.
But the paper suggests that people conduct fine evaluation over their own conditions before making hasty decisions, including their long-term financial status, health conditions, and the general atmosphere within their families.
[Many kids lost their parents in the massive quake.Now, thousands of people in China's big cities like Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou have registered to adopt these orphans.Many people are sharing the government's responsibility to look after these children.An article carried on a famuse Paper said such deep feelings and sense of responsibility are worth cherishing.The paper also suggests people to evaluate their own conditions firs.Ssuch as economic capability,health conditions,and the general atmosphere within their families,they must think it over before making hasty decisions.]

Many foreign governments and leaders have expressed their sympathies for the victims of the deadly earthquake.
[Many foreign governments and leaders have expressed their sympathies for the victims.]
toll[təul,tɔl]
n.过路(桥)费;损失,伤亡人数 v.敲(钟)

epidemic  [ˌepiˈdemik]
n.流行病；盛行 a.流行性的，流传极广的

makeshift  [ˈmeikˌʃift]
n.& a.权宜之计(的)，代用品

hasty  [ˈheisti]
a.草率的；急速的，匆忙的，仓促完成的
a, 급한, 성급한, 경솔한 ~ conclusion 속단, 지레짐작

think it over考虑清楚

你很猛，你敢发得再长一点么？

这是什么家教老师啊,做外贸客人会和你聊怎么多吗?下面是我客人发给我的:
first of all we hope that the earthquake is not concerning your country.
一些客人也不会把这种事情在业务里面谈起的.

[quote]原帖由 [i]vickyyulili[/i] 于 2008-5-22 11:45 发表 [url=http://bbs.fobshanghai.com/redirect.php?goto=findpost&pid=14692379&ptid=1146979][img]http://bbs.fobshanghai.com/images/common/back.gif[/img][/url]
这是什么家教老师啊,做外贸客人会和你聊怎么多吗?下面是我客人发给我的:
first of all we hope that the earthquake is not concerning your country.
一些客人也不会把这种事情在业务里面谈起的. [/quote]
主要是老师要跟我练一下口语,大家帮帮我吧

it's toooooooo long!:funk:

hehe  二楼的话说的好啊